Never again will I blindly say yes to a package tour Never again will I agree to something I did not find out the details for Never again will I say yes just to please the relatives Never again will I follow a bunch of aunties on tour Never again will I doubt my sensibilities Never again will I try to do something imensely stupid Never again will I set foot in bloody Shenzhen or China for that matter!
So, I thought I'd be nice and agree to go on a company tour with the extended family. I mean really, how bad can Hong Kong be? Spend a couple of nights in the crowded city, eat some food, buy some stuff, head home. No big D! Now here's the spoiler, weeks before departure date, I find out that it's gonna be 2 nights in Shenzhen, 1 night in Hong Kong... which technically means that we're going to Shenzhen, not Hong Kong as initially believed. WTF? Okay, so I thought, how bad can it be? Afterall, we all know that China is very developed now, Shenzhen is practically an extention of Hong Kong, blah blah blah. So I thought okay, let's just go with the flow, look-see look-see how.
Somebody please slap me on the head!
Just what was I thinking? China and me don't mix! I gotta be crazy! Okay let's just do China in point form:
How to tell you are in China...
1) Everyone...and I mean EVERYONE has to lug around a huge checkered plastic zip bag of stuff. You know, the refugee looking ones. What's in them? I don't know, and honestly, do you really want to know???
2) Push, shove, elbow you way around, nevermind if it's for the toilet, food, shopping etc.
3) Toilets...I'm not even gonna go there.
4) Police/customs people don't have name tags, just a long series of numbers eg. 294057306728 Can you imagine going up to them and say "Hi Mr 294057306728. we're here on vacation"???
5) Shenzhen is tourist destination wannabe. Every damn thing there is "specially created" for this industry. Any natural landscape? No. Any important landmarks? No. Any specific local culture? NO! In fact, the people living there come form everywhere else! What they have is 3 theme park/gimicky touristy areas, they call the 3 "flowers" of Shenzhen. One is a Disney wannabe theme park which, thank god we didn't go to. the Second, a Chinese Culture village and finally the so-called biggest attraction, the windows of the world! Let me just make it short and painless for you guys. Windows of the world= small scale versions of famous landmarks from around the world. Chinese Cultural village= small scale versions of famous landmarks from China. get the picture?
6) What you think is OTT (Over The Top) is not OTT until you see what they can do in China!!!! I must say, this is the first time I have ever experienced a show with every imaginable theatrical gimick, effect, performace item, animals, etc. etc! I must applaud this effort. Really, how many psuedo cultural shows include acrobats, horses, cannons, sleazy dancing women, large floats, fire, elaborate costumes, 100 odd dancers/martial artist, firecrackers, clowns, butterflies, brids, jar tossing jugglers and goats in one programme? At least I can now say "I've seen it all!"
I've never been a big fan of Hong Kong, but I was grateful to cross back into the former british colony after the whole Shenzhen fiasco!
Oh, but what's the the Hong kongers and their itsy bitsy doggies?
Travella Kennels - home of one of the best
Wires in the world...just like my Millie!
BTW, the top dog of 2004 is Millie's sister. Talk about blue blood!
Alaskan Klee Kai - Hailey's a Klee Kai,
find out more about this rare breed here.